Haven’t you ever wondered what makes rich people stay rich? This book was one of the first clues that showed me the skills of each class of folks (Poverty / Middle / Wealthy).
My art teacher wife brought a handout home from an in-service they had at school one day and it blew my mind.
This educator (Ruby Payne) had broken down Lower / Middle / Upper Class into skillsets and it really enlightened me to see how clear those classes really were when you understand how they think. Obviously it’s not perfect and plenty of people disagree with her but I was blown away at the insight I got from reading it and being myself a poor kid that “made it” so to speak.
- Lower Class / Poverty
- Solves problems through relationships and favors people over systems.
- Lives with constant instability, making short-term survival the primary skill.
- Navigates life through nonverbal cues, humor, and storytelling as social currency.
- Handles conflict through emotional expression more than logic or procedure.
- Makes decisions based on immediate need, because future resources are uncertain.
- Middle Class
- Uses planning, organization, and scheduling as their main tools for stability.
- Communicates in formal, linear, and rule-based patterns valued by institutions.
- Solves problems by accessing systems (insurance, banks, policies, procedures).
- Manages conflict through negotiation and logic, aiming to avoid disruption.
- Makes decisions based on long-term goals, savings, and predictable pathways.
- Upper Class / Wealth
- Operates through networks, connections, and influence, not systems.
- Protects privacy and power through guarded communication and indirect language.
- Navigates life using financial, political, and social capital as primary tools.
- Handles conflict through gatekeepers, attorneys, and intermediaries, often at a distance.
- Makes decisions based on legacy, continuity, and asset preservation over generations.
There’s much more to the book but these lists should give you an idea of why I like it so much I read several editions. Many people operation using these skills and often they start in one area (poverty) and end up in an area they really have very little training to function in (middle class or wealth).
Cribs was a show on Mtv that showed you how poor people behave when they get wealth.
It’s hard for people to believe that a mindset determines much of your reactions and behavior, but that just like learning a new trade you can learn how to be in a different class by studying the skills and learning those.
If you want to learn more – go get the book.